Where is my patience?

Jesus, I've been out of control lately. My patience is zero. I've been getting so frustrated. Stella has been so challenging lately. Mornings have been a battle: waking up and getting dressed. She fights and cries and kicks and screams and doesn't want to wear ANYTHING she owns. I screamed at her this morning :( my sweet, precious girl was just having a rough time dealing with waking up and I screamed at her for it. When I saw the heartbreaking look on her face and the tears streaming from her eyes I began to cry, too. I scooped her up from her heap on the floor and rocked her and we cried together. I apologized for yelling and told her how special she is to me. She fought me to get dressed, but we got it done. This isn't the first time I've lost my cool and I'm sure it won't be the last. Hopefully future frustration outbursts won't be so severe, though. I just can't help but think I'm damaging her in some way. I need to work on my patience, bad. I have such a short fuse and she is so tough lately. She's definitely testing my limits lately. But she's two. That's what she does. Erik keeps reminding me of this. I also can't help but think she is the way she is because I'm doing something wrong. What could I be doing wrong? I'm not fully present when we're together. I don't play toys with her every time she asks. Sometimes I'm too worried about getting the house clean so she watches a movie 3 times in a row. I feel like I have so much to do and so little time to do it. I work. I have to spend time with Stella on my days off, but on those days off I still have to make sure the house gets picked up and cleaned periodically. The dishes need washed so we can eat. The laundry needs done so we have clean clothes to wear. Meals must be prepared so she and I can eat. Erik told me a couple weeks ago that he would take over laundry as long as I had it sorted for him. Awesome. But having to remind and nag someone to do something ain't my idea of a good time. I'd rather do it myself. Anyway... I need to chill, enjoy my daughter. Shes only going to be this little right now. She's only going to beg me to play tea party with her for hours for a little while. She's only going to ask, "Mama will you play with me?" For a few more years. I make myself so sad that I'm wasting some of this wonderful time with her. I've been crying so much lately because I feel like I'm failing. I'm her universe and I'm mean to her sometimes :( I'm not always a nice mama and I desperately need to work on that. I want Stella and I to have the relationship that I never had with my mom. I want to be her best friend, her rock, who she looks up to, who she thinks is the most beautiful lady she's ever seen. I want her to be proud of me like I'm proud of her. That can't happen if I'm mean and short tempered and impatient. Tomorrow I'll take the day an hour at a time and control myself and be a good mama. I promise.